I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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