I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize