eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Randomize