I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
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