the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
