Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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