Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize