now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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