new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Randomize
