she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Randomize
