idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
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Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
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