p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize