sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
