I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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