yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
this will be a night to untag.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I'd cum for enchiladas.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Randomize
