He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
