Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Randomize