VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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