Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
