Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Randomize