i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major