Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
