can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Randomize
