Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
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