Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
