Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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