He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Randomize
