my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I cut my penus on the lid.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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