Are we in a gay sports bar?
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
True strength comes from lack of pants
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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