he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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