If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
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