Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Randomize