Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed