if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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