You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
