I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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