I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
