I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
this just has baby written all over it
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
