do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize