I just made out with a guy for $7.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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