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• (803): View more from South Carolina

  dude why did you let me call her?!

  (1-803): View more from South Carolina

  i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life

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• (704): View more from North Carolina

  I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.

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  27 Unforgettable Hookup Texts

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (210): View more from Texas

  I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.

  (1-210): View more from Texas

  I love milkshakes.

  (210): View more from Texas

  Not the point.

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?

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• (910): View more from North Carolina

  After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".

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• (917): View more from New York City

  How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!

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• 

  19 Groupies Confess What It’s Really Like To Hook Up With Famous Rockstars

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (941): View more from Florida

  oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.

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• (434): View more from Virginia

  Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?

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• (586): View more from Michigan

  If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style

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• (678): View more from Georgia

  Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.

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• (859): View more from Kentucky

  Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that

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