I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Randomize
