Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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