dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize
