where does the pee come out of this thing
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize