i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize
