She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
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So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
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If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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