Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
My Sexting was not on an AP level
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize