So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?