why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point