I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
ugly people sure do ruin things
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Contemplating These 27 Questions Will Make Your Brain Explode
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon