he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
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