I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
